In 2004 my husband bought me a puppy as a surprise. He thought she would be a helpful distraction to ease my sorrow during the first Mothers Day that followed the death of our infant daughter, Kennedy. We named our puppy “Kondilisa” in honor of then Secretary of State, Condoleezza Rice. Our version starts with the letter K because all of the names of the members of my nuclear family start with the letter K. Only my sister-in-law, Kathy, calls our dog by her full name; the rest of us called her “Kondi.”

Kondi has always been a smart, determined and optimistic doggie. When we moved into the house we live in now, we would put Kondi into the basement when we’d leave the house and when we returned she was always out. Hmm… “Kenny, you didn’t close that door tightly because Kondi keeps getting out.”

Kondi, Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier, 2011

One day, I put her down in the basement and waited quietly. From the bottom of the stairs, I saw Kondi stand on her hind legs and then use her paws to push down the universal door knob, to escape 1-2-3. (For those who haven’t seen them, a universal doorknob often has a handle rather than a round ball. It is designed to be easier for all human beings to use, especially those who might have physical challenges.) Clearly, these knobs work well, especially for smart doggies.

One of the best things about Kondi is that she has great expectations. She is always looking for something good to happen. This morning when I was getting ready to leave the house, I opened the pantry where I keep my soy bars and her doggie treats. She ran over looking like – “I sure hope I get a treat!” So I gave her one. The morning before, I was slicing an apple into pieces for my daughter to eat on the way to school. Kondi smells the aroma and sees me at the counter and she gives a quick happy wag of her tail. To me, it was like she was thinking, “wow, I might get a piece of apple.” And so I give her one.

Later it dawns on me – that I – am rarely like Kondi in this regard. And this is extra sad, because my “Master” is my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and He is waaay more generous that I could ever hope to be. I wonder how much stuff I miss out on, because I am not expecting anything “good” to happen. I am often not expecting anything or if I am brutally honest I am worried that something bad is about to happen.

I am praying for God’s help to enable me to have a more expectant heart for His goodness.  Psalm 27:13 says “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD In the land of the living.” (NASB)

Kelly

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